Alright, let’s tighten up our gear and get ready to delve again into the magical world of children’s pop culture! Huzzah!
I’m a little under the weather today, so once again I’ll be trying to do this sober. Well, hmm, I think actually I can make the best of both worlds, I’ll pound some NyQuil before watching this one. I cannot be held responsible though if I pass out halfway through watching.
Tonight’s feature is a special show being done partially by request. It was at the top of my list anyways, and on top of that some people wanted me to do it. So Yee-Haw! It’s time for some Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! And yes, that is the name of the show, exclamation points and all. You know, come to think of it, seems like alot of shows are using the exclamation point gimmick to make their show seem more exciting, doesn’t it?
Anyways, This show aired on Thursday, 2/14 at 1:30pm on Nickelodeon. It;’s a repeat from 2007 named ‘Mr. Valentine’. The digital guide description is as follows; Wubbzy helps deliver Valentines’ Day cards when the mailman gets sick, but is disappointed when there are none for him. It turns out his friends were only saving the best for last, as they surprise him with cards and gifts after he saves the day. (Animated)
Wow, kinda seems like all the drama has already been cut out of the show since they went ahead and spoiled the twist ending already. I mean, if I already know that Wubbzy is going to get gifts and cards from his friends, where am I supposed to feel the pathos for him? How can the show build drama? Geez, this is kinda like when I rented Reservoir Dogs in high school for the first time on the advice of a friend of mine. So I tell that friend, Chris Berzac, that I am planning on watching it after school that day and he blurts out, ‘At the end they all die, just so you know,’ Wow, thanks Chris, and here I was hoping that the movie experience might have contained some impact on me. He went on to tell me that ‘The movie had been ruined for him before he saw it, so he was passing along the disappointment’. I guess if you’ve never seen the movie yourself I just ruined it for you, but the damn thing came out in like 1991, you got nobody to blame but yourself, jerkface!
Anyways, this is not a rant about how Reservoir Dogs was ruined for me, this is a moment by moment review of Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! Let’s take a look at my first impressions despite not having put it on yet;
Obviously this show revolves around someone named Wubbzy. Exactly what Wubbzy is is beyond me. I know it’s animated, so it could be anything. My first visual thought is that Wubbzy is a poofy blue monster with a big mouth on his circular body. Now mind you I’m probably totally wrong, but what the heck? Also it is obvious to me that Wubbzy constantly does things to amaze all of those around him. I mean, the show is called Wow! Wow! Wubbzy with no less than 3 exclamation points!!! The name if the show is not ‘Oh yeah, it’s that guy Wubbzy’. It’s not called ‘I’m indifferent towards Wubbzy’, and it’s for sure not called ‘Blending in with the crowd, doesn’t talk much, they call him Wubbzy’. No my friends, that would suck. This is WOW! WOW! FREAKING WUBBZY!
Alright, I’m getting fired up, time to hit the NyQuil and get started.
Done, and for some reason my furniture seems alot more comfortable than it was before, huh.
We start with an ad for Air Wick. Really? I didn’t realize that the number one market for plug in air fresheners were small children, but then again I’m no longer in the advertising business. Thankfully might I add.
Wow, I’m just totally wrong about Wubbzy. He’s a yellow cat looking thing. He hangs with bunnies, and an animal thing with glasses I can’t quite identify, maybe a raccoon or something. Wubbzy lives in a tree, and hangs out and stuff, that theme song moved way too fast for me to totally follow.
We open with squirrels and birds and they are giving V-day gifts! Wubbzy checks his mail, Wubbzy gets no love! Oh no! Sorry, no drama happening for me, cause I know what’s going to happen.
His friends haven’t gotten their mail yet either, I think the mailman must be dead, to the post office we will go!
Oops, I may haver spoken too quick, Mr. Mailman is sick, not dead. He looks like Mr. Orange after he got shot, not to bring up Reservoir Dogs again. But thankfully Wubbzy and pals will deliver the mail for him! I wish more kids and animals would do that. You know, do my work for me when I’m not feeling like it, that would rule if a small team of cartoon animals would show up and work my shift and give me the cash. Ah dreams.
And now we’re delivering! Wubbzy rides on a Segway looking thing, Well, it’s more of a skateboard with a handlebar, so yeah, a Segway. Wubbzy delivers V-day cards to the animals at the zoo. Ok seriously, who is sending love cards to the animals? That is just weird, someone should look into that.
I think this is a classic example of giving all the minor characters screen time, as Wubbzy is delivering cards to everyone who had probably ever appeared on the show. Wubbzy was doing all the leg work when his bunny friend just built a machine to shoot the cards to all the proper mailboxes. The machine does not work, so the bunny dumps the work onto Wubbzy, who lugs out another load of cards and delivers them, strangely to more animals, is there some secret theme to this show that I should be picking up on?
Hmm, seems to me like the show should be called ‘Take advantage of Wubbzy’s kindness!’
One card left, deliver to the nerd raccoon animal from earlier, Walden! Walden is still planning his route to deliver his letters. Of course, Walden dumps the load of work on Wubbzy, who again takes the whole load onto his own shoulders.
This includes a stint delivering cards to Dinosaur Island, by raft no less! Wubbzy is one heck of a trooper! You know, I just noticed that everyone on this show lives in Super Mario World, I mean all the backgrounds look straight lifted from that game, like the clouds and square trees and stuff. I’m starting to look for question mark gold boxes.
One card left again, and it’s for the mailman! UH OH, it’s the plot point I NEVER saw coming; Wubbzy gets left out. there was no mistake, Wubbzy even owns up that he delivered every card, and slumps forward. Ok, a little pathos is in order, BUT WAIT!! everyone is outside with cards for Wubbzy! Wubbzy’s cards were stuck in the bunny’s machine the whole time! Dumb bunny.
Now a song! There is love everywhere! Love is on a rainbow! I swear Wubbzy was designed wholly to be placed on an ironic wristband at Hot Topic 10 years from now, I’m positive on this fact.
This song could be They Might Be Giants, but it is definitely not. Influenced heavily though, I’ll say that.
COMMERCIAL BREAK! And Nick Jr. wishes me a happy Chinese new year from a small black girl wearing a cast! Natch!
Should I fast forward through the commercials? No, these ads support the Wubbzy endeavor, let’s make fun of them instead!
1) Time Warner ad sales department needs you! Huh, appealing to kids to work in advertising. I’m pretty sure most ad campaigns were designed by 5 year olds, so this makes complete sense.
2) El Pollo Loco chicken fast food restaurants! They don’t have these in Michigan! It’s healthier so you know it’s in California! Yum!
3) IHOP, go there, eat waffles!
4) Cleaning products! Bam bleach in your toilet will work just fine! You know, it’s almost like these ads are not for the kids, huh.
5) Huggies ad! I think it implies that there is a kid who poops bricks, but I’m not sure, if my kid ever pooped a brick my first thought would be, dang, when did my kid eat a brick? I’m a bad parent.
6) American Intercontinental university! Go there!
7) Brooke shields for Colgate!! Now I’m sure these are for moms.
Back to the show!
Wubbzy in the Middle! His friends look unhappy! We open at Walden’s book house! The place is a mess, but Walden denies it, he should read the 12 steps. Ah there he goes, he owned it, he was listening to me, um type. He needs a hand putting the books away! Let me guess how this one will go; The bunny invents something crappy that won’t work, and then Wubbzy will end up just doing it all himself.
And bunny walks in with a machine to put books away! I wrote this show! And it doesn’t work! I FOR SURE wrote this show! And now we have a bigger mess than before, Word up, I am high fiving myself. Walden wants to fix the machine…and breaks it, DOH! And bunny is PISSED!!! Walden is PISSED!!! Wubbzy wants to play nice, but the FIGHT IS ON!!! no kickity kickball for you Wubbzy.
We go to the sitting rock, where Wubbzy formulates a devious plan, that does not involve putting all the books away, looks like I lost my job as writer for this show. The plan is blow up 2 balloons! This must work!
We sneak to Walden’s bookhouse, where he finds the balloon, with a note, ‘From your best friend in the world, meet me at some place’. I see where this is going.
To bunny’s house! Same deal. Wuzzleberg square is the place to meet for those playing along at home.
This plan is way too easy, no way it will go off without a hitch. They bump into each other, and the RAGE IS ON!!! Kickity Kickball, let’s get it on! Or not, cause they are still mad, and they leave Wubbzy holding both balloons, OH NO! He flies away past the square Super Mario clouds.
The chase is on, Walden and bunny are going after him! Up a mountain, holy crap! Now straight to Burry Bush Canyon. Ahem, I don’t need to go there, I’ll let that one pass.
A helicopter tries to run Wubbzy down but misses, so instead it’s into an…airplane car wash! um, huh? Is that how it works? Ah, why not!
They need to get Wubbzy a book to make him too heavy to fly away on the balloons anymore, so they will use the machine from earlier to make it happen. Yes! This is right, this will work! Launch away!!! And down he comes, nice. That went like a puzzle from Zork 2, and one that I would have needed the crappy hint booklet to solve too, by the way.
Now we are all friends again, til the machine launches Wubbzy into the air high high away! And he lands in a hard fountain and is fine. If he was fine from that fall though, why didn’t he just let go of the balloons and fall before? Oh well, logic and kids animated shows need not coexist in the same realm together. Those circles need not connect.
Now Wubbzy is having issues with stamps, and he’s covered in them! He’s out of stamps, cause he’s covered in them, so he mails himself to the bunny to deliver the card, I mean, of course he does! Excuse me for asking but if it wasn’t too much to deliver mail to dinosaur island earlier, why was it so rough for him to hand deliver this one letter without use of the postal system? Ah, time for another commercial break. But I’m pretty sure this is over very soon, so no commercial recap this time around, cause we got 2 minutes til this recording stops. I don’t like ads in my small kids shows, there ought to be a law!
And yes, we’re done.
So there you have it, I find myself strangely unaffected by this show. There was nothing too terribly horrible to it, but it felt a little more fast paced and extreme than the others that I been watching. Not overtly extreme, but something just felt a little too hurried for me, I guess kids with ADD (Which I believe is now 93% of all kids these days) will be able hang with it. Eh, I don’t know though, it felt like SpongeBob but aimed at kids about 5 years younger. Parents will probably be able to watch this one without their heads exploding, and I suppose that is a good thing.
And I’ll be looking for those ironic wristbands at Hot Topic.
PS. I’m still taking suggestions for the next show to watch. so if you got something, let me know! barring any suggestions, I’ll just hit up the next one on my DVR when the time feels right.