Ok, so I rip on writers….alot.

However I find it very justified, I want all of them to succeed, but often times am left thinking one of 2 things;

1) How lazy are you?
2) Do you know anything about writing?

This leads me to this post. I put forth a call to arms looking for sketches for the show I run. And got a myriad of really good stuff. I also got a fair amount of things I just plain did not know what to do with. I suppose when you fire a shotgun, you cannot aim where the buckshot goes.

So what follows is one of the ‘scripts’ I got, from a ‘writer’. The e-mail was subjected as ‘Genius at work’. I will not change a letter, but present it to you as I saw it. Enjoy!;

scene 1 interior,

John sitting on table looking at laptop
roomate dave walks in asks john whats he looking at

John: man i m sick of dating im looking for hookers on craig list

dave: thats lame dude, the cops are cracking down on that

John: Im a john looking for some, in this bad economy, it sucks

Dave: hows your job going?

John:im stuck here looking 4 hookers because i got layed off, im going to blow my last check on some poontang!

Dave: How do you get layed off from burger king, are you retarded?

John: Dude, if i was you know i would cash in with disability checks,

Dave: what you going to do, shouldn’t you look for work?

John: Im going to bang a hooker then move back in with my parents after i get evicted

Dave: dude i can cover your half this month

John: I need you to cover every month because im going on vacation is that cool?

Dave: no dude, you need to get another job.

John closes his laptop and walks away.


I mean, seriously? What was I supposed to do with that? Is this ‘writer’ like 14 years old? What possible show would actually consider using this? Oi…

So anyways, I’ve read and seen alot of good writing out here, and have much respect for those who can ‘bring it’ on a consistent basis. But then again I see alot of stuff like this, and it gets tiring after a while. So if ever you hear me banging on writers, please understand I’ve probably just been inundated with a pile of scripts like this.


4 Responses to “Writers”

  1. dnowell Says:

    I’m thinking we have our newest Monkey House writer!

  2. tjpearce Says:

    I was thinking the same exact thing! This is totally a monkey-house strip.

  3. Almighty Ray Says:

    Um, I can give you his e-mail if you would like…..

  4. dnowell Says:

    Nah, I’d hate for us to be outclassed by such obvious genius…

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